I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
