the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
