on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
