So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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