Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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