I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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