Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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