Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize