at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
