i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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