Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
