At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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