So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Text me some of your sweat
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