Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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