put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
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