So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
