the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Shame - the story of my life.
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