I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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