i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Randomize
