I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
just found out that she named her cat after me.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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