i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
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