your room smells of hookers.
And success
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
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