then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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