Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
