i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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