Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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