The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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