So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
