You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
No stitches, just platelets and will power
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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