I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
