These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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