ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
