Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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