Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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