I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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