Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
