How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
