whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
