i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
