The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
