you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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