Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
