You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Randomize
