yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Randomize
