I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize