Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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