Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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