i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
