ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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