No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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